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by Mary Sincell McEwen
A host of athletes from around the world will arrive in Garrett County this weekend, each prepared to put him or herself through a grueling test of stamina, strength, and mettle. They will jump into the fifth annual “Tri-to-Win” SavageMan Triathlon, slated for Sept. 17 and 18, and will run, swim, and bike multiple miles on one of the most difficult courses in the world.
All the while, the athletes will be raising funds and awareness for the Joanna M. Nicolay Melanoma Foundation, known as “the voice for melanoma prevention, detection, care, and cure.” Each year the name of the organization is included in all the stories and publicity, and each year thousands of dollars are raised to support the organization’s mission. But who was Joanna M. Nicolay, and how did she inspire such a movement?
Joanna was a loving wife and mother, a woman whose own mother died when she was only 12. She was kindhearted and funny and devout. She was dedicated and hardworking and brave. And after a very long and arduous struggle, she died of melanoma in 2003. Because of her legacy of courage and faith, her family and friends were inspired to build something in her honor. The Joanna M. Nicolay Melanoma Foundation was born a year after her death.
Joanna was first diagnosed with melanoma in the mid-1970s. Her daughter, Denise Nicolay Safko, remembers that time well.
“My mom always had a small spot on her forehead – she wore bangs to cover it. She told us it was caused from when she was a teenager and was playing in a softball game and was hit in the head with a bat!” Denise said. “Something about the mole changed and she went to see a doctor. She was in her 40s and I was in high school. When she got the diagnosis of skin cancer, we really didn’t think much about it. But when it came back again and we learned more – that is was melanoma – and could be deadly – I was scared. I kept thinking, ‘My mom has cancer…’ With each recurrence of the disease, in the ’70s and ’80s, the melanoma became dramatically more aggressive.”
Despite the illness, Joanna was a busy mother, with both Denise and son Keith, and a happy wife to Robert (Bob). Lifelong Baltimore area residents, they met as teenagers and married when she was 18. In addition to caring for her family, Joanna, a devout Catholic, had a daily habit of praying for people.
“She had a prayer list of people for whom she would pray several times a day,” Denise said. “She would add people she didn’t even know to her list. She would ask me every now and then, ‘How is so and so – do I need to keep praying for him/her?’ She would not take someone off her list until she knew.”
The melanoma continued to grow in Joanna, and she continued to beat it back down. She endured a 12-hour operation in 1985 to stem the disease.
“That surgery was to remove the cancer and do reconstructive surgery,” Denise explained. “The stress of waiting through the surgery was incredible for us. I had recently started my first job after college and had to call in sick the next day because I was so exhausted from the stress.”
This experience taught the Nicolay family firsthand how strenuous, frightening, and arduous the “cancer journey” can be for both the patient and loved ones.
“Surgery and waiting for biopsy results is very hard on everyone,” Denise said, “They call it the ‘waiting game.’ After that surgery we really didn’t think we would have my mom very long. The melanoma had made it through the bone to the protective covering of her brain. My dad was able to retire a year earlier around that time, and I remember praying for them to have five cancer-free years together. We got that and more. For 15 years after that procedure, she was cancer free.”
During this time, Joanna lived her life with as much enthusiasm as she could muster, and her family cherished the days with her.
“We were so fortunate to have her that much longer,” Denise said. “She was prepared to go back then, and we all knew what a gift it was to have her with us. As a result, her joy of life came through stronger and stronger every year. She loved the extended family that came when I married Greg [Safko] and then had our two sons, Trevor and Robbie. Everyone who met her during that time felt her joy and outreach of love.”
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